Almost there…

My computer should arrive this evening!

It actually showed up yesterday while I was gone for a bit, knew that would happen.

I’ve logged on to my bank alt once and another alt in danger of losing mail.

Since my computer started it’s suicide spiral last weekend I have returned to reading and remembered why I don’t read much any more.

You see, I love books. I love reading.

Since last weekend I’ve read close to 3000 pages.

I’ve stayed up far later (or earlier) than I have while playing WoW.

When I pick up a book that I haven’t read before, I’m lost to it, enthralled by it – even if I don’t particularly care for it.

I can only recall closing 1 book with no intent to finish it, A Wrinkle in Time, back in elementery school. And even then it was more to spite an instructor that had no place in a position to shape minds as an educator. I can’t even recall what it was I found distasteful about the book. Maybe I should find a copy.

Reading becomes a compulsion for me. If it’s a book I’ve read before I’m able to shake myself free of its grasp and set the book aside to return to it later.

A new book? Almost impossible. It’s hard enough to stop at a chapter break. I read Clive Barker’s Imajica in 2 sittings, over 800 pages. The first was during the day. The second was when I got back up and finished it that night because I could find no sleep before it was ended.

I will read through slitted eyes, lids scarcely apart. When I finally can read no longer I dream that I read, the text printed on the inside of those very lids that shut me away from the pages.

I’ve been told that I can carry on a conversation with someone while I’m reading, much like the sort you can try to have with someone while they are watching TV. Nod and murmur in the right places and have no recollection of the discussion at all.

For years I cut back on my reading because it would frustrate my husband. Now, he reads more than I do.

But he’s able to put a book down.

In the middle of a sentence, he can put a book down.

And I cannot.

It’s a strange sort of addiction to have.

Gambling? Drinking? Shopping?



What’s even stranger is that WoW does not hold a similar compulsion to me.

I have trouble around TVs, the box with moving pictures is similar in compulsion to reading for me, but less so. Of course, there are days when a flashing light or soothing display of colors is enough to entrap my interest for moments at a time. There are days I wonder if I suffer (or enjoy) some small measure of brain damage.

I think it’s the interaction in WoW that keeps me more sane than when I read.

While reading, if it’s skillfully done, I feel the weight of the characters, I cheer the heroes on and rally against the villains in my heart.

But I no more control them than I control the sea. I can only hold on to the vessel of words and let it take me where it may.

In WoW, I have responsibilities and reactions to be accounted for. If I’m not awake I may die to a void zone, my hero’s life cut short through failure on my part. It demands more from me than being a careless passenger and so my mind knows that there are times it must be set aside so that I may return to the problem stronger, refreshed.

I’m looking forward to my return to WoW, I’m tired and need the rest.

This entry was posted in Random.

6 comments on “Almost there…

  1. Tay says:

    I know exactly what you mean. Since I stopped playing WoW I have read over 20 books from the Ravenloft series a friend of mine let me borrow. Its hard to put them down, even when its one I dont care for a whole lot, I keep hoping it will get better. Now school is back though so I’ll have to read some different books =p


  2. Millea says:

    I am almost exactly the same way with reading. My friends and family could never understand and usually mock me for it. I am not quite as bad as you are. Once my eyes start closing and I am squinting at the pages (usually with my glasses off and held up against my nose) I will stop reading and sleep. I too have gotten up in the middle of the night to finish a book.

    The only way I’ve found to combat this is to stop getting new books during the week. I only buy new books on a Friday night or Saturday. This way I am making sure I’m not messing with my sleep needed to function at work. So this means I can now take my time re-reading books over and over again.

    I could not read A Wrinkle in Time. When I first was given the book to read, I was 10. It bored the ever living snot out of me and I could not get into it. It is one of the few books that I never finished reading.

    Welcome back to WoW :D


  3. Magejuego says:


    Ever read Cat’s Cradle?


  4. Tebla says:

    A Wrinkle in Time is what started it for me also in grade school. That whole trilogy. That and the Xanth novels, especially the first 5 or so. My latest series that I couldn’t put down is the Malazan Book of the Fallen. Pretty sure that is the best series ever written and I can’t wait until the next book comes out.

    I would read constantly until I could be considered antisocial and, I am afraid, Wow has come to take over reading for me.

    Not so much anymore, but when I first started playing it was bad. And I couldn’t understand why my wife was mad all the time. I can see now and do my very best not to let it get out of control. Helps a little that my guild has fallen apart over the summer and we are lucky if we can get a raid together for one night. I would probably look for another guild, but I kinda like the lack of pressure to log in, even if it’s only in my head.


  5. jong says:

    800 pages in 2 sittings?

    I think it took me all my college years to read 800 pages… only if I count phone book pages too. What’s the number for Panda Garden again?


  6. Euripedes says:

    I can’t put a book down either, but I think I’m actually a little worse than you are.
    When I’m really zoned into a book, I don’t even recognize that there is a conversation going on. If I’m reading, and someone stands right in front of me and shouts my name, I won’t even be aware they exist.
    I have to be physically prodded. :)


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