Not Helping: Cooking, Bathroom, Math

A little hodge podge of kitten-related hijinks.

Kittens not helping with cooking:

A family gathering was planned for Saturday.

What would you like us to bring?

“Side dish.”

OK, flip through the WoW Cook Book (seriously, I have it and use it) and find Festival Dumplings.

This doesn’t look so bad, I have the ingredients on hand, I’ll get up Saturday morning and make dumplings.

Notice a discrepancy between the ingredient list calling for a singular yolk but the instructions adding yolks, plural.


Start making dough.

Erm… something is not right, there isn’t enough liquid to go with the flour…

I’ll just drop a line to the nice people who wrote the recipe and in the interim check some related recipes to see if I can salvage what I started.

Email sent; per similar recipes it looks like I can try adding some more water.

Go back in to the kitchen.

Little girl is on the counter, ears deep in the egg white bowl.

Little boy is playing on the floor with a half-mixed pile of dough.

Fuck dumplings.

Kittens not helping in the bathroom:

It was only a matter of time before they figured this one out.

Kittens not helping with math:

The kittens have a plethora of toys.

Not that you would ever know this looking around the house.

All the toys are neatly hidden away under and behind furniture.

So periodically I grab the flashlight and a yard stick and poke about to drag some toys back out in to the light so perhaps they (the kittens, not the toys) will stop terrorizing my toes.

Find a pink floofy ball under the dresser.

Put it on the bed.

Cat jumps on bed.

Next piece of furniture scores 2 floofy balls and a jingly ball.

And a rawhide chew they apparently bullied away from one of the dogs.

And Tir’s comb.

Throw away the rawhide, put the comb away, and toss the three toys on the bed to join the pink floofy ball.

3 + 1 = 3?

The pink floofy ball is gone.

Another search of the vicinity turns up no trace of it other than the two pieces of pink tinsel on the bedspread.

Please be on the look out for a small, pink ball made of some sort of fluff and tinsel. It is most likely hiding in the company of another dozen toys, some floofy, some jingly, and at least 3 shaped like small fish.

(Addendum to the missing toy alert: the remaining 2 floofy balls, yellow and purple, are now MIA but the pink one has resurfaced.)


2 comments on “Not Helping: Cooking, Bathroom, Math

  1. telanarra says:

    I can attest that she has actually cooked items from the cookbook and they were tasty. She even did so w/o us having to notify the local FD and with out us having to have a hazmat team on stand by :)

    and floury eggwhited kittes: you could have had fried kitty :) D would have liked that :)


  2. Phil says:

    Why do you put up with this? Do they save lives by solving medical mysteries that regular doctors just can’t solve?

    Can they not be trained? Or at the very least, electrocuted?

    You’re in an abusive relationship, and you need to seek help.


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