My cover’s been blown

A couple of us in the guild have “hidden” alts.

These are toons that we have purposefully left out of the normal guild for various reasons.

My priest is my hidden alt.

I’ve kept him out of the guild for two reasons:

• First, I want to avoid the temptation of power leveling through the lower levels. I really want to learn how to heal as I get each new spell and see how they all fit together. I don’t want to get to 80 and freak out with too much stuff to figure out.
• Second, I <3 my guildmates. I really do. But the people we hold dear are also the people most likely to send us off the deep end and the people I am more likely to go ballistic on and then later regret it. Absence makes the heart grow fonder sort of thing. And sometimes I really just want a break from them.

Of course, I forgot the deductive capabilites of one of my guildmates. I should know better, I used to be his boss. I know that when the topic is completely useless and irrelevant to any actual productive activity he has the nose of a bloodhound and fucking channels Sherlock Holmes.

I inadvertently gave him just one too many pieces of information one day and he was able to track me down. I guess I was the only level 11 priest in all of Tirisfal that day.

So he knows, but has been very respectful about leaving me alone.

I have conversed with another guildmate about our hidden alts. He knew I had a priest of a certain level. I knew he had a hidden ret paladin. We talked about gear and stats and how much easier these instances are the second time through. He also reads my blog.

So I’m in LFG for SFK. SSSSSSSSSSSFK. Not RFK.

A rogue picks me for group. We also end up with a pally, a mage, and a DPS priest.

The paladin asks me, “So [name]. Are you terrible?”

Is this the standard greeting for healers in a group? Should I have been harassing healers in all my PuGs?

It wasn’t quite the same as the greeting I got in that one group, but maybe this is someone that reads my blog…

The paladin has “ret” in the name (a really cheesy name, I might add) so was a little unsure about the tanking, but said he had tanking experience on another toon so he could do it.

Hmmm… the plot thickens.

I suggested that he keep Righteous Fury up and we should be fine so long as no one does anything stupid.

He responds, “Righteous frickin’ Fury”

OK, that’s an inside joke in the guild. Our normal pally tank eventually had to get an add on to tell him to put Righteous Fury back on when it dropped because he was tired of hearing me scream in vent to put his RIGHTEOUS FRICKIN’ FURY BACK ON BEFORE WE ALL DIE AGAIN.

That pretty much seals it and we have a couple laughs.

So much for “hidden” alts.

The SFK run was insanely easy.

Not for a lack of trying on the part of the mage and the rogue.

What is it with DPS thinking they need to get the first shot in? I never had this issue. I recognized that I was squishy. I did not want to attract attention to myself. This is not the mage you’re looking for.

The ret pally did just fine tanking and no one died so I must have done just fine healing.

I got a nice belt drop for my troubles and completed 3 quests. I also hit level 26.

Group disbands, pally logs off.

I get a random whisper asking if I’ll heal RFK.

But I hate the piggies… meh, should be fast. Sure.

Join group.

Group leader is a Forsaken rogue, 27.

Next person is a blood elf rogue, 31.

Next person is a Forsaken rogue, 31.

FFS, get someone that can wear mail in here to tank!

Last person joins… blood elf… level 27… rogue.

Oh, hell no.

The 4th rogue and I start comparing gear, she’s decked out in almost as much BoA as I am, the other three seem to be average geared except the leader who is undergeared.

But hey, he says he just spent 30 gold gearing up his character. We all had a pretty good laugh at his expense on that one.

The rogue leader at one point insinutes that because I’m the lowest level member of the party (by 1 level) that if there were to be ANY problems with the run it would be because of me. Not because we don’t have a tank. Oh, and the fact that I outgear most healers 5 levels higher than me doesn’t even come into play.

They finally convince me to give it a shot. I figure it should be a good exercise in “OMGWTFBBQPEWPEWHEALZ” and get ready to head out.

But they found a pally in LFG so just dumped the 4th rogue. Mind you, she had offered to step out if a tank was found, but the leader just dumped her.

The leader pipes up with the random comment of, “I’m adding these rogues to my friends list!”

OK… random… smile and nod… I’m guessing he’s about 12.

So the two 30s rogues say they are at the stone summoning but it’s not working, we’re all going to have to run.

What? I was just there 2 levels ago, that doesn’t make any sense. I should still be well within the level range, as is the lower level rogue.

Wait. Why are they in Tirisfal?

Look at the map.

Yup. They’re up at Scarlet Monastery.

Um, guys. We seem to have a difference in opinion on which instance is being run. Can we come to a decision here?

*chirp* *chirp*

Leader finally says, “we’re running RFK”

OK, you might want to convince your other 2 rogues of that. They are no where near RFK and just tried to summon us to SM.

No response from the rogues.

The leader starts going off about how he’s been trying to put this group together for 2 hours and it’s so hard.

I almost spit out my drink.

I tell him to organize a 25-man Naxx and then we’ll talk about hard.

The conversation meanders and I’m just shy of being an absolute dick. I’m having fun.

Within a few minutes people come to the conclusion that the party is going no where and begin to drop out. The 2 rogues never did say anything again.

I’m the last to leave the group. Right before I do I post, “Well at least you have those 2 rogues on your friends list!”

Almost immediately, I get invited back.

WTF? How much abuse must I heap upon you before you will leave me alone?

He invites back the 4th rogue that he booted earlier and makes an attempt at an apology.

She leaves anyway.

Finally he gets a new pally and a shaman.

I’m testing the waters so see if we can try to 4-man this.

The pally seems intelligent, with a sense of humor. The shaman has BoA gear.

So, rogue… what’s your main’s class?

Knowing what someone normally plays may offer insight to their playstyle.

“I don’t really have one.”

OK… anything above 60?

“I’ve got 8 toons on this server, all 20-30.”

Oh god, we’re doomed.

He’s 12 and has ADD.

Somehow, he finds a bored DK that will run it with us.

I’ve been wanting to avoid getting run through instances, but I’ve already proven I can heal this one so I’ll let it slide this time. I also want more wool.

The rogue is a bit of a loose cannon.

He kept running up to the next mob, no stealth, and going to town right in its face.

Rogue, I don’t heal stupid, OK?

“But I like being in the action.”

I can tell by your gear that you have run in groups before. (He had a couple BoP blues from RFC and surprisingly, BFD.) Has no one ever explained the concept of tanking to you?

“I’m trying to get new gear, it’s not my fault it’s bad.”

I honestly was not making a crack at your gear.

Somehow, I manage to keep him alive through the run. Probably had something to do with the fact he was the only one I had to heal.

I picked up a BoE wand that was better than my enchanting one, but I think it’s time for me to make myself the next wand up. I’m also sporting the Moonsoul Crown and loving even that tiny bit of mana regen. I loves Mp5.

On my mage in a PuG, I feel nervous about my performance. Will I be good enough? What if I do something stupid?

On my priest it’s rapidly becoming: Why do you suck and why are you doing stupid things?

Playing a healer triggers an elitist complex in me.

I’m enjoying myself. =)